Mother Of Tears (2007)

JUNE 6, 2008

GENRE: ITALIAN, SUPERNATURAL
SOURCE: THEATRICAL (REGULAR SCREENING)

I have read some fairly bad reviews of Mother Of Tears (aka La Terza Madre), and while I can't say that the film is perfect, I really don't get why some folks seem to think that this movie is a complete departure from the other two in the series. Maybe it's because I just saw Inferno for the first time about 2 months ago, and thus haven't 'waited' 27 years for this movie, but I felt it was a worthy followup and more or less a return to form for Argento. Some reviews have said that the film is too goofy - I'm sorry, was I supposed to take a guy being attacked by about 10,000 cats serious? Anyone who thinks this is him slumming it should watch The Card Player and then re-watch Mother. At least this movie has the good sense to have a killer monkey and gratuitous gore.

Like Inferno to Suspiria, there isn't any traditional sort of sequel feeling to this film, though they are acknowledged; Inferno's events are mentioned in passing, and Suspiria is given a bit more of a shoutout, but one doesn't need to see the films to understand this one. And given the disappointment others seem to feel, maybe not seeing those films (which are admittedly better) will help you enjoy this one more, as your expectations won't be as high. It's the same way I felt about the newest Indy movie; to me, someone who didn't grow up watching them, it felt like a good continuation. Yet, if Chevy Chase were to make a new Fletch film today (I watched that movie so many times as a kid it has literally informed my speaking mannerisms), I would be scrutinizing every frame, so I can at least understand where these folks are coming from. Still, one shouldn't discount the film entirely simply because it's not a masterpiece.

I had a blast for the most part. It was like the Argento of old; we got skeleton-less victims, nonsensical character actions, utterly baffling scare scenes, a fantastic Claudio Simonetti score (aided by a Cradle of Filth title song that I have been singing all night), Udo Kier hamming it up (though his role is way too brief), uncomfortable moments with his daughter Asia... it's all here. Like a homecoming, it's as much a celebration of the past as it is about the current event itself. There are even little nods to other Argento films; Asia's final scene more than just slightly resembles the climax of Phenomena.

The story is a bit uneven, particularly in the first hour. Even though Asia is the heroine, she is absent for a good 15-20 minute chunk while we follow the investigation through the eyes of her lover, a character who turns out to be rather minor in the overall scheme of things. She doesn't need to be in every scene, but this sort of setup occurring this early in the film is a bit jarring; perhaps going back and forth between the two for a while (instead of all of his scenes together) would have been better. Inferno had a bit of this as well, but there there WAS no real main character, it was like an ensemble all the way through.

The gore stuff, on the other hand, is fantastic. This movie offers 100% more half-eaten baby than any other film in recent memory, and there's plenty of other highlights - numerous throat slashings, a woman choked with her own intestines, an impalement or two, a head squished in a door... good stuff. It's not as setpiece driven as the other films - it actually flows pretty well and the killings feel organic to the story, and other than the sequence with the lover guy, Asia remains front and center throughout, and thus makes it easier to follow along. On the other hand, this means that there aren't many opportunities for Argento to indulge in his stylish visual mastery - it's more a return to form from a story standpoint than a technical one.

The release is limited, which is a bummer but fairly expected - I can't really see anyone other than Argento junkies going out to see this in theaters, even if it is more accessible than the other 2 films in the series (for better or worse). If it's not playing near you, please seek it on DVD and relish in the fact that Argento has made his most Argento-y movie in over a decade. Maybe it doesn't quite fit in with its thematic predecessors, but it fits in with his filmography as a whole better than all of his recent work.

What say you?

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Argento, Italian, Supernatural,

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Phenomena (1985)

MAY 17, 2008

GENRE: GIALLO, ITALIAN, SUPERNATURAL
SOURCE: DVD (OWN COLLECTION)

Ah, Phenomena. My introduction to Italian cinema! Of course, by that I mean I saw Creepers, the severely edited US version of Argento’s film. I believe my mom rented it when I was about 6, because it had the girl from Labyrinth in it (occasionally known as Jennifer Connelly), and assumed I would enjoy it (not as much as I would when I hit the age of 11 or so and realized that Connelly was in fact one of the hottest women in the world). As a kid I remember being completely confused by the film, and thus “hated” it. I watched it again when I was about 17, this time the correct 108 minute version, and liked it a lot, and decided to start watching more Italian horror, which is how I came to see Demons and Zombie (and thus got introduced to Lamberto Bava and Lucio Fulci). So now, once again 11 years later, I watch it again as a sort of seasoned veteran of the output of one Dario Argento.

And it still holds up. The kill scenes are grand (if a bit jarringly edited at times, such as the beheading at the beginning), the plot is a nice blend of the usual black gloved killer stuff with the rather odd “Insect ESP” angle, and Donald Pleasence is, as always, a delight. I also quite much liked the monkey (why couldn’t she have gotten into the house in time!?!?!? :(), and the killer is one of Argento’s most memorable nuts.

The opening scene is a particular delight. In addition to being set in a location that looks a lot like the one in the climax of Opera (still my favorite Argento film), the credits reveal that none other than Giorgio Armani was the costume designer. You always hear about big actors who have horror movies in the early parts of their filmographies, it’s amusing to know that the same goes for fashion designers. His costumes for Connelly are much appreciated (she spends most of the film in a nightie. Fine by me.).

Ironically, I think it would be even better if it was edited down a bit. New Line (who distributed the film in the States) had the right idea, they just went overboard. For example, there’s a scene in an asylum that is among the most useless scenes in film history. All it does is foreshadow (rather clumsily to boot) the backstory that the killer is about to reveal herself anyway. An extra line in her exposition could have removed the ‘need’ for the scene entirely (I say ‘need’ because, as far as I’m concerned, we don’t need to know how the killer came to have a son anyway). This sequence comes after the film’s most annoying scene, where a body is wheeled out of a house, set to an Iron Maiden song. It is completely inappropriate to the scene, which is followed by a scene of Connelly running around (also useless). Without this entire chunk of the film, not only would it be shorter, but simply less “huh?” worthy.

There’s also a completely odd moment early on where the film suddenly has a narrator. He never says another thing in the film, and in fact his one line is pretty useless anyway, since he’s narrating action that wasn’t hard to follow anyway (he essentially says “And so Jennifer arrives at school”, over a shot of Jennifer arriving at school.). The movie has a knife wielding monkey, an insect trying to arouse Jennifer Connelly, etc... but nothing really made less sense than the use of a narrator here.

Another puzzling moment occurs about an hour in or so. Connelly is on a bus, using a fly to determine where the killer lives. When she gets off the bus, we see a guy sitting in the front row suddenly stand up, walk to the back of the bus, and shut the window next to the seat Connelly just vacated. Huh? Even for Argento, these things are a bit baffling.

(I just checked the IMDb, I guess there’s a scene where a woman asks her to shut the window that was cut, but why cut the setup and leave the punchline? And it looks like a dude shutting the window anyway. And even if not, she’s on the other end of the goddamn bus!)

Still, a damn good film, and one of the better introductions to Argento one could offer. It’s not as strange as Suspiria or even Opera, nor is it as completely accessible as Trauma or some of his newer films, which might give someone the idea that an Argento film is of complete and sound logic. A nice sort of hybrid, with the bonus of an incredibly cute and yet then-underage Connelly, which makes you as the viewer feel as creepy as you are creeped out.

The DVD is pretty packed compared to some of the other Argento films in the set. In addition to a commentary that’s worth listening to (since Argento is on it, plus Claudio Simonetti!), there are two music videos, which are interesting as both are instrumental songs. There is also the traditional interview with Argento where he discusses the film (he says it’s his favorite), and another making of piece that is, for some reason, half dubbed, half subtitled. I would have liked a bit about the alternate, 82 minute version, but oh well.

On a side note – did anyone besides me think that the girl who first taunts Connelly in the film’s big Carrie ‘homage’ was Coralina Cataldi-Tassoni?

What say you?

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Argento, Giallo, Italian, Supernatural,

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The Card Player (2004)

MAY 12, 2008

GENRE: ITALIAN, SERIAL KILLER
SOURCE: DVD (OWN COLLECTION)

There aren’t too many Argento films left for me to watch, which is pretty great. This is the 10th I’ve watched for HMAD, and with the 2-3 I had seen before, I’d say I’ve gotten a good sense of his style and themes. Which is why I feel safe saying that The Card Player (aka Il Cartaio) is the least Argento-ish of his movies. Not that it’s bad, it’s actually a pretty good “serial killer taunts the police” movie. But that’s all it is in the end, and other than the Claudio Simonetti score (which is also atypical of the composer, as it is entirely electronic based, to the point where it’s essentially techno), there is nothing here that suggests the master is the one behind it all; no stylish touches that elevate it above any of its cinematic brethren.

But, as said, it’s still pretty good. I had fun trying to figure out who the killer was, and was wrong, so that’s good (I DID correctly assume that the killings were pre-recorded, so the “movie-killer-guessing” part of my ego was only partially deflated). And despite the relative lack of Argento’s visual style, it’s an immaculate looking DVD. Blacks are actually black, instead of the faded gray that a lot of movies (including Argento’s own Stendhal Syndrome) suffer from on their DVD. I almost thought I was watching an HD DVD at times, until I recalled that the poor format died before it got around to releasing obscure Italian horror movies.

It’s also got a nice autopsy scene that made me flinch a bit. The cop is taking a scalpel to the corpse’s eyes, sort of cutting mucous-y fluid away. Gah. There’s also a nice sort of scare when a corpse (maybe the same one, I already forget) “pukes” water into a guy’s face. Otherwise, though, it’s the usual cop/thriller/killer stuff – the killer comes to our heroine’s apartment, she falls for a fellow cop who ends up dead, etc. It’s actually pretty similar at times to that Untraceable movie. At least I think it is, I’ve forgotten just about everything about that movie already.

The extras are a mixed bag. There’s a lengthy interview with Argento, and another with Simonetti, that are quite good and informative (and in Italian, even though the movie is in English). But then there are two other featurettes that are wholly worthless, simply presenting (the same) behind the scenes footage over music. The second one, which is actually shorter, is a bit better, as it includes some thoughts from the lead actress, but it’s still hardly worth your time. Still, nearly 40 minutes of extras, plus trailers and a commentary (by Alan Joneszzzzzzz), is pretty sweet considering how good the picture looked. Say what you will about Anchor Bay’s tendency to double dip – their transfers are almost always top notch.

In my notes I took, er, note, of the fact that the hot broad from Do You Like Hitchcock appears as one of the victims. I don’t really have anything to say about it, but, yeah; the hot broad from Do You Like Hitchcock appears as one of the victims.

What say you?

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Argento, Italian, Serial Killer,

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Do You Like Hitchcock? (2005)

MAY 4, 2008

GENRE: ITALIAN, THRILLER
SOURCE: DVD (OWN COLLECTION)

Enough of this thriller shit... tomorrow’s movie better be about monsters killing people in incredibly graphic ways. After the very “light on horror” Burbs and Godsend, I was looking for something more traditional. Thankfully, Anchor Bay answered the call, sending me the new Dario Argento Box set yesterday, which features two films already reviewed on HMAD (Trauma and Tenebrae), one I haven’t seen since I was a kid (Phenomena), and two I haven’t seen at all. One is The Card Player, and it better be more of a horror movie than Do You Like Hitchcock? (aka Ti Piace Hitchcock?), which features three kills in the entire film, and one is a goddamn chicken (and another is just a dude accidentally being hit by a car). If I have to stretch the criteria for what is and what isn’t a horror film for a goddamn Dario Argento movie, there’s something wrong!

It’s not a bad film at least (miles better than Phantom of the Opera, which was the most recent of his films that I had seen prior to this, and so bad I almost decided to never watch another of his recent films). In fact, considering it was a TV movie, it’s actually pretty solid, if not exactly top notch Argento. Also, on that note – what the hell kind of television does Italy have? This “TV movie” has a very graphic kill, rampant nudity and profanity, suggested incest, etc.... so really, saying “it’s good for a TV movie” is sort of giving it too much credit, since the medium obviously doesn’t have the same limitations that US television does. Also, it’s shot on video, which is a bummer no matter what medium/country you are working in, and even moreso when the film is directed by one of the most visually creative horror directors of all time.

None of the video looked really bad though, and in fact on a technical level, other than an odd glitch during the opening credits (why are they windowboxed?) it’s a perfectly good and professional looking film. But I expect nothing less from Dario.

What DID bug me was the setup of the video store that serves as the jumping point for several of the film’s plotlines. I spotted Green Mile filed along with several Hitchcock thrillers, and Mission Impossible 2 next to The Exorcist. Who the fuck alphabetized and categorized this place? There were other errors as well, not to mention a baffling amount of promotion for The Card Player (it’s almost as if the film was mocking me for not watching that instead).

And on that note, our protagonist is a pretty awful film student. He talks like your typical movie nerd guy, but then we see him watching Nosferatu on his widescreen TV, and he has the film stretched horizontally rather than at the correct square ratio. You fucking jerk! Look, no one likes to watch 4:3 movies on their nice 16:9 TV, but for Christ’s sake, don’t stretch out the image to make up for it! The movie looks like shit when you do that! Some fucking film student; he woulda gotten his ass kicked at my school.

As for the movie itself? It’s an interesting concept, but not enough is done with it. For some reason I was under the impression that the film concerned a serial killer who was killing people in Hitchcock homages (so like, he would kill someone in the shower, and throw a guy off Mt. Rushmore, or whatever). But instead it’s basically just a Strangers On A Train/Rear Window hybrid, with a bit of Dial M For Murder (and an affectionate mother that I guess is supposed to evoke Psycho, or at least Psycho IV), with our hero thinking that the femme fatale is copying the films on purpose. The film’s final scene is fascinating, as he realizes a pretty awful fact about himself; but that should have been the focus of the film, not a mini “twist” at the end.

Still, mediocre Argento is better than the best work of many others, and it’s certainly an entertaining piece. The Rear Window-esque finale is pretty suspenseful, and the hero’s never-fully explained flashbacks/dreams about two witches in the woods are vintage Dario. The box set is reasonably priced – just consider the film a bonus disc and you’re pretty much guaranteed an entertaining watch.

However, unless you speak Italian, don’t bother with the making of piece – it’s in Italian without subtitles. It’s not too hard to figure out what’s going on, but since these things are sort of worthless to begin with (there are no interviews included within) it’s even less appealing when you can’t really understand exactly WHAT boring things they are saying.

What say you?

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Argento, Italian, Thriller,

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Inferno (1980)

FEBRUARY 9, 2008

GENRE: ITALIAN

SOURCE: DVD (ONLINE RENTAL)

While I was going through pretty much the entire Dario Argento filmography early on in the Horror Movie A Day oeuvre, I somehow skipped over Inferno, which doesn’t make a lot of sense, since it’s the sort of sequel to Suspiria, one of few I had seen prior to HMAD, and the sort of prequel to his next film, Mother Of Tears, which I got to see some of last year and was pretty intrigued by what I saw. Anyway, I finally got around to it, and while it wasn’t bad at all, it wasn’t up to par either.

One issue I had with the film is that it wasn’t batshit insane like Suspiria, but instead seemed more or less plausible. People had skeletons, died via reasonable means, etc. But at the same time, the narrative was almost non-existent. Just a bunch of folks hanging out, reading and listening to music, and every now and then someone would die. The thruline, such as it is, concerns a book called The Three Mothers. Whenever someone gets their hands on a copy they usually end up dead. Alchemists and witches seem be particularly interested in it.

There’s not even a real lead character. Every time you meet a person you think will be the heroine, she dies. There’s a bland guy who manages to survive til the end, but he doesn’t do very much in the meantime other than remind me of Brian from Prince of Darkness.

Still, it’s pretty fun at times. In one of the many shots of books on a shelf, we can see one simply called “A Book Of Good Poems” (it seems pretty thick for that title to be true though). The subtitles also provide occasional amusement, such as when they cut from Rome to New York and the subs inform us that it’s the same night in April, which is sort of redundant because the scene is simply showing the other side of a phone call. When else would it be? This isn’t Frequency. I also giggled at the score a few times, especially the end title music which had lyrics that sound like “Domino! Domini! Not Suspiriorum!” Sadly, the instrumental score was NOT done by Goblin and thus pales in comparison to pretty much every other Argento film of the period.

There’s also a fantastic scene where a character is “attacked” by a dozen or so cats. I put attacked in quotes because it is painfully obvious that someone is just throwing the damn things at the actor, and clearly aren’t interested in hurting the person since they almost immediately make a break for it (resulting in about 900 more cuts in the scene than necessary). Plus, come on, cats?? Where’s a killer with Arengto’s hands when you need him?? In fact, a lot of the kill scenes in the film, enjoyable as they may be, could be avoided if the characters weren’t so clumsy. One immolates herself by pulling a fiery drape down onto herself, and another falls down in the water and can’t get back up, resulting in being bitten by rats and then nearly beheaded by a crazed hot dog vendor (this is the weirdest scene in the movie, for the record).

Even the non-death setpieces are impressive, especially the beginning one with a woman who is determined to get her keys back, even if it means jumping into a hole in the middle of the floor and swimming around the submerged level below. But that’s part of the problem with the film – the sequences by themselves are pretty great, but they don’t add up to much. It feels at times like 2-3 different films were edited together.

Like all Argento films (except for Phantom of the Opera), it’s worth watching, but I wouldn’t recommend starting with it if you're new to the man. It’s just too average (this is probably due to the fact that it was financed by Fox) for Argento fans and yet still too strange for a casual horror fan.

What say you?

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Argento, Italian, Video Nasties,

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Tenebrae (1982)

OCTOBER 2, 2007

GENRE: GIALLO, ITALIAN

SOURCE: DVD (ONLINE RENTAL)

I think I’m about halfway through the Dario Argento filmography now, thanks to Tenebrae (aka Unsane). Also, I’ll use this space to point out I will be adding more tags so folks can find a collection of reviews more easily. I have added Chilling Classics, and now that I have about a half dozen, I’ll be adding “Argento” as well. Hurrah!

This one’s sort of similar to Deep Red, except the main guy is a novelist instead of a musician. And it’s a lot more coherent. In fact, this may be the most logical and accessible of Argento’s films (at least of the ones I’ve seen). The murders aren’t overly graphic (the victims even seem to have skeletons for once), there aren’t too many “Huh?” moments, and there’s even a relative lack of nightmare scenes (the few that we do see are actually flashbacks of a sort). Granted, there are a few things that require the characters to do things for no reason (like when the main character puts his bag down at the airport and walks away), but that’s nothing compared to the utterly baffling nature of something like Phenomena (aka Creepers). The strangest moment in the film is probably when John Saxon, apropos of nothing, demonstrates how stable his hat is by sort of headbanging. There’s also a delightful scene where Saxon laughs at some guys fighting in the background (something that occurs a few times in the film – there’s almost as much background violence as there is murder scenes). Good to know ol’ Chief Thompson enjoys other folk’s misery.

I watched the English dub, which was quite good (I’m pretty sure most of the actors were speaking English). The only time the Americanization is ever evident is in the first scene, where the killer is reading a book that is written in Italian, yet magically translates to English for close-ups. Also, in this scene, Argento demonstrates that when he speaks English, he sounds like David Warner (though maybe this isn’t Argento’s voice, he says it is but maybe he means the Italian dub version).

As always, the music by Goblin (not actually called Goblin here for some legal reason I can’t recall) is fantastic. Hilariously, the characters seem to like it too, as one of them is actually listening to the score on her record player at one point. Another character even yells “Turn it down!” OK, so maybe the movie is a little weird.

The commentary is pretty great, despite the usual gaps I’ve come to expect on an Argento track (since it’s always been like 15 years since he last watched the movie). “She was kind of a whore, right?” someone comments about a particular actress, “A bitch?” And they all get confused at the pop song placed over the credits, which none of them are familiar with, leading to the otherwise unheard of extra feature “Alternate End Credits” which features the song they got so miffed at (as the DVD producers went back and put the right song in for the feature after Argento complained). DVD is not anamorphic, but otherwise it’s a nice little package. But apparently, out of print, hence the lack of an Amazon link. Figures. A rare movie I not only recommend to fans but non-fans as well, and I can't help you buy it. Yet, goddamn Fright Club is easily located for sale! Fuck you, whoever invented moratoriums.

UPDATE: Anchor Bay has re-released the film. Woo!

What say you?

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Argento, Giallo, Italian, Video Nasties,

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Phantom Of The Opera (1998)

AUGUST 19, 2007

GENRE: CRAP, HERO KILLER, ITALIAN
SOURCE: DVD (ONLINE RENTAL)

And so it has come to this, an Argento film in the Crap genre. I tried really hard to think of a reason why Phantom Of The Opera should be kept out of it, but it really offers nothing more interesting or entertaining than the sight of Warlock fucking Asia Argento from behind. And I am sure there’s another movie that features the same.

It’s borderline depressing that Argento, arguably one of the greatest horror filmmakers of all time with unparalleled ability for creating memorable images and setpieces, couldn’t even make the chandelier sequence interesting. The best murder in the film is when a midget rat catcher gets randomly beheaded (in a scene that is an obvious allusion to Silent Night Deadly Night and Friday the 13th Part 5), a character who isn’t even in the original story that I can recall. Which isn’t much of a surprise; I’ve said before I don’t like the Phantom story anyway, and it seems the further they get from the source material (Phantom of the Mall, or Argento’s own Opera) the better.

But even if the story remained in any way compelling after some 30448560856 versions, everything seems lazy here. The dubbing on the first scene of Asia singing is atrocious (it’s not even in English anyway so why not just use her voice?), the makeup effects are week (this Phantom doesn’t even have a facial scar)… even the goddamn opening titles look like they’re photoshop files with poorly matted out backgrounds. Hell, the character of Raoul disappears for so long I actually forgot who the hell he was when he finally showed up again.

The main problem is everyone except Asia and Julian Sands has apparently stepped in from the musical version (stage or Schumacher, your pick) of the story, acting broad and gestating wildly, while Asia just does her “I’m hot and everyone wants to either fuck me or kill me or both” shtick she always does, and Sands channels Fabio. And the rat catcher guys are seemingly inserted from Delicatessen or City of Lost Children.

Christ, what a fucking mess. I’m not even going to bother with the extras.

What say you?

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Argento, Based On Novel, Crap, Hero Killer, Italian,

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Trauma (1993)

AUGUST 12, 2007

GENRE: GIALLO

SOURCE: DVD (ONLINE RENTAL)

You gotta wonder what family gatherings are like at the Argento home. Stendhal of course had Dario directing his daughter being raped, and in Trauma, when she was only like 16, he’s got her nude in one scene, and making out with a guy 2x her age in another. He also is apparently confused as to where the vocal chords are located in the human body, as no less than 3 disembodied heads are seen talking in an otherwise realistic movie. What the hell’s with this guy?

Oh but I love him so. Like almost all of his films, I enjoyed every minute of it, even when I hadn’t a clue as to what was going on (why the dream sequence with Asia breaking a VHS tape?). There’s a bit with a little kid who you think is going to decapitate himself that ranks as one of my favorite bits in his modern career, the only disappointing aspect is that the kid doesn’t go all the way, as it were.

This one is a lot like Deep Red at times, but that’s a good thing, since that’s one of his best. I’d rather be reminded of Deep Red than, I dunno, Jenifer (“Hi, I’m Steven Weber, and I’m gonna write myself into a movie where my character is constantly getting blown”). There’s also a lot of moments that made me laugh out loud, like when a pharmacist punches a guy out for trying to fake a prescription. I think the world would be a better place if more pharmacists dealt out their own unique brand of justice.

Also the motive behind the killer’s… killings (look, YOU write 200 horror movie reviews in as many days, see how witty you get), is pretty goddamn disturbing and awful. Expectant mothers should decidedly NOT watch this film. I would even go so far as to say it’s the most genuinely horrifying thing I have seen in a horror movie in ages.

The Anchor Bay DVD has a good collection of extras as well. A 20 minute ramble from Argento about his experience on the film, some behind the scenes stuff of Savini at work, and a commentary by Alan Jones that is similar to the Tim Lucas ones on the Bava films, except he sounds like he actually wants to be there (unlike Lucas) and occasionally offers some wonderfully random asides (“I saw Demons with Clive Barker, who looks terrible nowadays”).

Dario, if you’re reading this: Not that I ever totally understand any of your movies, but this in particular troubled me: Why the ending with the reggae music and dancing girl?

What say you?

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Argento, Giallo,

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The Stendhal Syndrome

AUGUST 5, 2007

GENRE: GIALLO, ITALIAN
SOURCE: DVD (ONLINE RENTAL)

Argento and Troma, together at last! I love that I live in a world where Alone in the Dark has two DVD releases and yet a film from one of the greatest horror filmmakers of all time has an introduction that includes Lloyd Kaufman pushing Toxic Avenger 4 and almost falling into a subway entrance.

Yes, for whatever reason, Argento’s mid 1990’s film The Stendhal Syndrome couldn’t get a better distribution than Troma, who has given the film, in addition to the usual Troma bullshit you have to suffer through on all their DVDs, the absolute worst video transfer I have ever seen for a relatively new film.

Having apparently been left out in the sun and bathed in milk, this transfer is an abomination to the AV world and an insult to Argento. I can overlook the lack of an anamorphic transfer, but not the fact that all of the blacks look a yellow-ish gray or that there is absolute no detail in anything on screen. It basically looks like a VHS bootleg. Granted, it’s not one of his best films, but no director, least of all a true master like Argento, deserves to have their film shown in such a manner. Luckily, Blue Underground is re-releasing the film this fall (that's the version in the Amazon link, for the record); hopefully the transfer won’t be such an ocular affront.

The extras are nothing to write a blog paragraph about either. Despite being billed as a “Special Edition”, most of the extras are about Troma, not the film (or none of the above: “Ruggero Deodato remembers Cannibal Holocaust” - ??? That movie’s not even a Troma release!), and the two that actually do pertain to the film are poorly shot and edited. Whatever.

The film itself is OK. The story is fine, and the Ennio Morricone score is phenomenal, but as a whole the movie is a bit overlong. Also, one can’t help but be distracted that the director’s daughter Asia is in the film, playing a character who gets raped twice. What the hell did they talk about on the set? “Hi Dad, what are we filming today?” “You, crying, while you are being raped.” “OK, sounds good, don’t forget today is Mom’s birthday.” It’s just odd.

I was disappointed that the titular syndrome wasn’t used very much in the film after the first half hour. I find it to be a pretty fascinating affliction (and it’s real) and I think more could be done with it, instead of the rather bland gender reversal motifs that make up most of the film. As someone who suffers from a few odd syndromes himself (such as benign fasciculation syndrome, which causes certain muscles to randomly and rapidly contract, or twitch, for hours or even days on end), I would like to see more horror films use random diseases as a backdrop. I bet Wes Craven could make a great movie about carpal tunnel.

Also I should note, as every other review of this film does, that this was the first Italian film to use digital effects. It shows.

What say you?

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Argento, Giallo, Italian,

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