Hillary Bell Locke's "Jail Coach"

Hillary Bell Locke graduated with honors from Harvard Law School, worked for a prominent New York law firm, and now practices law in a city far from New York but not under that name.

Here he shares some suggestions for casting a big screen adaptation of his new novel, Jail Coach:

Matthew McConaughey would be perfect for Jay Davidovich, the 6'4" blond-haired/blue-eyed Jewish Loss Prevention Specialist. I would have no trouble believing McConaughey putting a thug to sleep by stuffing a condom with quarters and using it as an improvised blackjack; and then, when the condom breaks, not saying, "Keep the change" on his way out (although in the movie version he probably will say that).

I like Dakota Fanning for Katrina ("like the hurricane") Thompson, a fundamentally decent high-school drop-out/ex-con artist familiar with jail, the Marines, and "cheap-ass Russian pistols." Thompson will bind your wounds and tear up if you say something sweet -- but before you threaten her little girl, glance in the mirror and make sure that's the way you want to look on the day you die.

The third key character is Kent Trowbridge, a talented actor with "a smile that could launch a million ships if women between 15 and 55 ever amass that many." He's basically a good guy but, as Thompson tells him when she explains why he needs a jail coach, "There's something about you that makes people just wanna kick the living shit outta you. That's your problem right there." So the obvious choice is Bradley Cooper.

Learn more about Jail Coach at the Poisoned Pen Press website.

--Marshal Zeringue

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Marjorie Senechal's "I Died for Beauty"

Marjorie Senechal is the Louise Wolff Kahn Professor Emerita in Mathematics and History of Science and Technology, Smith College, and Co-Editor of The Mathematical Intelligencer.

Here she dreamcasts an adaptation of her new book, I Died for Beauty: Dorothy Wrinch and the Cultures of Science:

A movie, or an opera? One thick thread in this complicated story -- Dorothy Wrinch's epic battle with Linus Pauling, the famous chemist -- demands the stage. "Two brilliant, arrogant, competitive antagonists with a flair for publicity and a touch of the devious! And what a plot!"(See Chapter 16 for a synopsis.) But I'd opt for the movie if Emma Thompson plays Dorothy. Emma, please say yes! Dorothy was beautiful, brilliant, charming, courageous, dismissive, imperious, infuriating, vivacious, witty, and fatefully stubborn, all in a British accent. This could be the role of your career.

That settled, let's try to cast the other 75-plus colorful characters in Dorothy's fascinating life. I'll suggest a few. Hugh Bonneville, lately Lord Grantham, is Dorothy's father, the tough engineer-boss of a London waterworks company, and Meryl Streep is her mother, a tough cookie. (But would they take these roles? Both die early on.) Judi Dench is Miss Procter, the terrifying headmistress of the Anglican day school Dorothy attended from 4 to 16; "Proc" haunts her to the end. For Dora Black, Dorothy's best friend at Girton College, I nominate Ellen Maddow, the New York actor. Ellen's husband, the actor Paul Zimet, must play Bertrand Russell, the great philosopher and logician. Russell was Dorothy's close friend and mentor even after he ran off with Dora.

D'Arcy Thompson, the eminent but grandfatherly naturalist, is crucial: he lured Dorothy from math to biology in the early 1930s, before molecules gleamed in biologists' eyes. Dorothy set out to decipher the living cell and in short order proposed the first-ever model for protein architecture, a symmetrical cage of Platonic beauty. Chemists on both sides of the Atlantic rushed into proteins, some to defend her, some to refute her, and a few to determine the truth. Dorothy was soon the eye of a storm; D'Arcy stuck with her to the end of his life. I'm not sure who could play him, or Dorothy's two (successive) husbands. But Jodie Foster is surely Pamela, her conflicted daughter.

Linus Pauling had little use for math and thought symmetry was nonsense. And he was powerful. To banish Dorothy and her model once and for all, he published a list of her errors and laughed her out of the field. (Few noticed that his arguments were as wrong as King James I's against the evils of smoking.) Who better to play Linus than the great man himself? True, he died in 1994, but artfully cutting and pasting the many documentaries made in his lifetime would bring him back to life. We'd still need an actor for scenes played out of the public eye, like turning down her grant proposals and so on. Who?

Dorothy found haven in a small New England college, where she taught generations of students that beauty is truth and truth will out. She defended her model in the face of mounting evidence; partial vindication arrived too late. Curiously, in his old age Linus too crawled out on a limb, promoting vitamin C as a cure for colds and cancers. Just as Dorothy believed that geometry trumps chemistry, Linus believed that chemistry trumps medicine. He defended his views against the mounting evidence to the end of his life.

My word count is up, with 66 characters -- Joseph Needham! Irving Langmuir! Dorothy Hodgkin! Niels Bohr! -- still uncast! Suffice it to say that I Died for Beauty, the movie, needs a highly gifted casting director. And perceptive scriptwriters. The book is a swirl of ideas, dreams, ambitions, philosophies, and prejudices, scintillating in sync like gemstones in a kaleidoscope. The movie must be too.

Learn more about I Died for Beauty at the Oxford University Press website.

--Marshal Zeringue

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Anne Lawrence-Mathers's "The True History of Merlin the Magician"

Anne Lawrence-Mathers is senior lecturer in medieval history at the University of Reading.

Here she shares some ideas for the leads and director of an adaptation of her new scholarly book, The True History of Merlin the Magician:

When I wrote The True History of Merlin the Magician I had no real visual image of Merlin in my mind – how can you tie down someone who ‘lived’ from the 5th century to the 16th, and took the forms of boy-prophet, scholar, doctor, hermit, Welsh warrior-prince and half-demon, to one physical incarnation or appearance? The one thing I was clear about was that the historical Merlin was not the aged sage in a pointy hat seen in Disney’s version.

But, once I started to think about Merlin as a movie, the actor to play Merlin was obviously Johnny Depp. A blend of Edward Scissorhands, Captain Jack Sparrow and The Mad Hatter is about as close to the Merlin of medieval chronicles and prophecies as I can imagine – though adding to these the hermit who can see to the very end of time and understands the secrets of the earth might be a stretch even for Johnny Depp. Of course, since Merlin can change shape, and take on the appearance of any person he chooses, this movie would not need to be restricted to just one lead actor. Yet the versatility of an actor like Johnny Depp is so impressive that it’s a form of magic in its own right, and I think it would help to get across the message that Merlin was truly believed to be a real person.

One of the chapters of the book looks at how Merlin the historical figure became so famous that courtly romance (the equivalent of historical novels, in a way) were written about him and became best sellers. It was these romances which imagined an explanation for Merlin’s disappearance from the histories after he’d brought about the birth of King Arthur. The story was that there were two things even more powerful than Merlin’s magic: love and feminine cunning – and the two were embodied in the character of Viviane. Here is a powerful character, but one who is also a misogynist stereotype. Viviane starts out as a young girl sent to entice the great magician, grows into a powerful enchantress as she learns Merlin’s magic, and ends as a ruthless killer (in some versions at least). I am going to cheat slightly and go for a younger Helen Mirren, in her incarnation as Cleopatra, blending into her role in Prime Suspect. That may sound surprising, but to Viviane, Merlin is a villain.

Finally, the director should be Sam Mendes. It’s not that I think Merlin is an early James Bond (though the fictional Merlin was a Brit who travelled the globe, settling political, diplomatic and even religious crises, so I might be on to something). It’s more that I enjoy the idea of Merlin as a musical, with all the doomed romance of Cabaret.

Learn more about The True History of Merlin the Magician at the Yale University Press website.

--Marshal Zeringue

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Timothy Hallinan's "Crashed"

Timothy Hallinan is the Edgar- and Macavity-nominated author of numerous widely praised books—twelve novels and a work of nonfiction—including the Poke Rafferty Bangkok thrillers and the Junior Bender mysteries.

Here he dreamcasts an adaptation of his newest book, Crashed:

Crashed is the first in a series featuring Junior Bender, a San Fernando Valley burglar who moonlights, usually reluctantly, as a private eye for crooks. I've been fascinated for years with the shadow world of crooks, which exists in the same towns and on the same streets as the world most of us inhabit. But let me tell you, a block of nice houses is a different landscape for a burglar than it is for someone who lives there.

The books are funny, although the mysteries are real, people actually get killed, and there's nothing “cozy” about them. If I were a film director pitching the idea (which has, in fact, been bought for movies) I'd describe them as “Monty Python noir.”

In addition to being a burglar, Junior is an unhappily divorced man and the father of a thirteen-year-old daughter, Rina, whom he loves more than anything else in the world. He's eminently plausible as a straightforward middle-class, middle-thirties guy, and he can easily muster a convincing semblance of innocence. The other thing about him that matters (for casting) is that he's nearly always the smartest guy in the room.

I've always been drawn to actors who seem to have a dozen things going on in their minds beyond the words they're saying. My first thought for Junior was Robert Downey Jr., who constantly gives the impression that he might walk through a door onscreen and come out into a completely different movie. And then my wife, Munyin, fell in love with a two-season television series from 2008-2009 called Eli Stone starring Jonny Lee Miller, now playing Sherlock Holmes in a modern-day TV reboot opposite Lucy Liu. In Eli Stone, Miller was so convincingly American that I was stunned to hear his British accent in the DVD extras. He'd be the ideal Junior Bender.

For Junior's best underworld friend, Louie the Lost, a former getaway driver whose lack of a sense of direction finally cost him his job, I'd want the younger Danny DeVito. (I often hear DeVito's voice when I write Louie.)

In the book, Junior is forced into preventing the sabotage of a big-budget x-rated movie that's being produced by the San Fernando Valley's leading gang figure, the beautiful and effortlessly lethal Trey Annunziato. Trey inherited the job by killing the person who held it before she did, Deuce Annunziato, who happened to be her father. Her natural habitat would be the Vatican under the Borgia pope, and to play her (since I can have anyone) I'd approach Angelina Jolie. There's some history here, too, because Jonny Lee Miller was Jolie's first husband.

And finally, the “adult” film is supposed to star a drug casualty named Thistle Downing, now impoverished and barely sentient, but once the most beloved child actress on television, a brilliant natural comedian who gradually lost her talent and her confidence over the course of several years in full view of half of the American public. I'd love to have one (or, for that matter, both) of the Olsen Twins play her. They could do alternating scenes. I think they, or one of them if the other is busy, would be brilliant.

There are lots of good short parts, many of them very vivid crooks, and what I'd love to do it bring Preston Sturges and his entire stock company back to life and just hand the film to them—as long as they'll accept my stars, I mean.

And I have no idea what direction Lionsgate, who bought the film rights, will actually take, but I hope they read this.

Learn more about the book and author at Timothy Hallinan's website and blog.

The Page 69 Test: Crashed.

--Marshal Zeringue

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Karen Engelmann's "The Stockholm Octavo"

In Karen Engelmann's The Stockholm Octavo, Emil Larsson is a self-satisfied bureaucrat in the Office of Customs and Excise in 1791 Stockholm. He is a true man of the Town—a drinker, card player, and contented bachelor—until one evening when Mrs. Sofia Sparrow, a fortune-teller and proprietor of an exclusive gaming parlor, shares with him a vision she has had: a golden path that will lead him to love and connection. Set against the luminous backdrop of late eighteenth-century Stockholm, as the winds of revolution rage through the great capitals of Europe, the novel brings together a collection of characters, both fictional and historical, whose lives tangle in political conspiracy, love, and magic.

Here Engelmann shares some suggestions for casting an adaptation of the novel:

Here’s the weird thing: a few weeks ago I actually had a phone conversation with a producer interested in optioning the book. “What actress do you think should play Mrs. Sparrow?” he asked.

It took me a few seconds to reply, surprised he wanted my opinion. “Well, I always imagined Kristin Scott Thomas. She’s a fabulous actress, the perfect age, looks Swedish and speaks French.”

“She is fabulous,” the producer noted. “I just did a movie with her. Ryan Gosling played her son.”

“Ryan Gosling!!!???” I squealed, serious novelist dissolving into tabloid junkie. “Ryan Gosling can have any part he wants…”

That ended the discussion, and rightfully so. I love going to the movies, but otherwise have a ridiculously limited and naive view of the film business. Let the professionals do their job! However, this does not mean that I cannot create my fantasy cast from the daydreaming comfort of my sofa, bowl of popcorn at hand. Here is my Seeker, the Eight from his Octavo, and several other key roles.

Emil Larsson — narrator, customs officer and man of the Town: Ryan Gosling, of course!

Mrs. Sofia Sparrow — card shark and cartomancer: Kristin Scott Thomas.

The Uzanne — Baroness and villainess: Laura Linney.

Johanna Bloom — runaway apothecaire: Emma Watson.

Anna Maria Plomgren — tempestuous army widow: Noomi Rapace.

King Gustav III — monarch of Sweden: Stellan Skarsgård.

Duke Karl — the king’s younger brother and rival: Michael Nyqvist.

Master Fredrik Lind — calligrapher and social climber: James Callis.

Captain Hinken — smuggler: Peter Stormare.

Christian Nordén — fan maker, refugee from the French Revolution: Simon Baker.

Margot Nordén — Christian’s French wife: Marion Cotillard.

Lars Nordén — Christian’s younger brother: Alexander Skarsgård.

Mrs. Murbeck — Emil’s landlady: Lena Olin.

Old Cook: Beryl Patmore, of course.

I cannot wait to get their autographs!

Learn more about the book and author at Karen Engelmann's website.

Writers Read: Karen Engelmann.

The Page 69 Test: The Stockholm Octavo.

--Marshal Zeringue

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Derek Haas's "The Right Hand"

Derek Haas is the co-writer of the films The Double, Wanted, and 3:10 to Yuma, and author of The Assassin Trilogy: The Silver Bear, Columbus and Dark Men.

Here he dreamcasts an adaptation of his new novel, The Right Hand:

Since I've already sold the rights to Universal and producer Scott Stuber, this is an intriguing question. My book centers on a middle-aged spy trying to get a nineteen-year-old Russian girl out of her country and out of harm's way. I'd love to see someone like Bradley Cooper, who has yet to really conquer an action movie tackle the role… and I'd pair him up with a beautiful, young talent such as Jennifer Lawrence. As far as directors go, I'd like someone who has proven as adept at handling character as he has action with a real visual style, like Rian Johnson or Chris McQuarrie. Give us a year and we'll see who rises to the challenge!

Learn more about the book and author at Derek Haas's website.

Writers Read: Derek Haas.

The Page 69 Test: The Right Hand.

--Marshal Zeringue

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Stacey Madden's "Poison Shy"

Stacey Madden holds a BA from the University of Toronto and an MFA in creative writing from the University of Guelph. He lives in Toronto.

Here he shares some ideas for casting a big screen adaptation of Poison Shy, his first novel:

Poison Shy is full of unattractive characters, so any actors I mention here would have to ugly themselves up a bit for their roles in the film.

I think Poison Shy would make a great low-budget, grindhouse-type movie. It’s full of sex, violence, and people doing horrible things to each other, and what better way to emphasize the book’s gritty nature than by adapting it into a deliberately grainy film with dim lighting and poor sound quality.

For the role of Brandon Galloway, my hapless narrator who works in pest control, I would cast Joshua Jackson, of Dawson’s Creek fame, and ask him to come to the set each day on three-or-fewer hours’ sleep. Brandon’s a hard-on-his-luck kind of guy, and I think Josh Jackson would do a good job portraying Brandon’s pessimism and paranoia.

The real star of the show, however, is Melanie Blaxley, Brandon’s femme fatale paramour. Melanie, a pale and freckled redhead, is described in the book as “beautiful in a trashy kind of way”, causing Brandon to suspect that she could be “the surprisingly attractive offspring from an incestuous marriage” – a character description I’m sure is every young actress’s dream to be told they’re perfect for.

In any case, there is no shortage of flame-haired beauties who, with the help of trick camera work and a talented costume designer, could summon just enough of their inner-bitch to tackle the role of Melanie. The first one who comes to mind is British starlet Natalie Press, who is best known for her role as Mona opposite Emily Blunt in the 2004 film My Summer of Love. Other options are: the raspy-voiced Emma Stone, the doll-like Lily Cole, and short-lived pop star Lena Katina, who was the redheaded half of the fake lesbian duo t.A.T.u.

If none of the aforementioned beauties want to stoop to play the likes of Melanie, there’s always Lindsay Lohan.

As for the supporting roles, I would love to see the man with the best name in Hollywood, Christopher Mintz-Plasse, in the role of Darcy Sands, Melanie’s vile roommate whose unwashed hair smells like gravy. I think playing a scumbag like Darcy would help Mr. Mintz-Plasse to break free from being typecast as a “nerd”. Other options for Darcy are Seth Green, Shawn Ashmore, and Dominic Moynihan. (Sorry guys.)

For the role of Bill Barber, Brandon’s overweight and gassy co-worker, there’s really no other option besides superstar John Goodman.

Brandon’s schizophrenic mother, Eileen, is a difficult role to cast, but I think Diane Wiest, who is probably best-known for her role as the cosmetic saleswoman Peg who ventures into Vincent Price’s castle in Edward Scissorhands, could pull it off.

For the role of Detective Basil Darvish, who is probably the noblest character in the book, I would cast Brian George, who most people would recognize as the finger-waggling Babu Bhatt from Seinfeld. All he needs is a trench coat.

Ewan Bremner, who played Spud in Trainspotting, would be perfect in the role as Viktor Lozowsky, the skeezy bar owner who wears thick-rimmed coke-bottle glasses and shaves his head with razor blades.

Finally, in the roles of Brandon’s dead (and deadbeat) father, Jack, who we see only in flashbacks, and his wrong-side-of-the-tracks mistress Gloria, I can see nobody else but Nick Nolte, circa his mug shot days of 2002, and a haggard-looking Kim Basinger.

My sincerest apologies to any of the aforementioned celebrities who stumble upon this post.

Learn more about the book and author at the publisher's website and Stacey Madden's Twitter perch.

The Page 69 Test: Poison Shy.

--Marshal Zeringue

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